January 16, 2011
There is no race. There is no race. There is no race. Not on this page, or the main page, or in our very real and unreliable world. Can you detect the internal struggle I have with that?
There is no race.
THERE.IS.NO.RACE.
So why do I want to bodily fling myself upon my horse and go!
"Self takes other self aside"
SHUT IT. THERE IS NO RACE.
*sigh*
ok....
~E.G.
December 28, 2011
I feel so lucky. So hopeful. Positive. Blessed. I have my number one man (LSEGH) pulling for Journey. He has her little hooves looking so darned good! Then I have my coach. He calls it like it is, and so many things have become clearer to me. I’m no longer guilt-ridden, and driven with self-doubt about the past. Journey, is still this kooky little thing, and we have some sort drama on most rides, but it is a flash in the pan, then she is back to business. She is forward but not crazily so, and this little horse doesn’t quit. DOES.NOT.QUIT. In training I've stressed her, but not pushed past her boundaries. Just seeking that baseline, and moving it out a tiny bit at a time. She has some weaknesses (she must run booted still) (behavioral hiccups), but honestly only time, work, and experience will ever get those sorted out completely. We have to start stretching some miles, building some cardio, and sustaining the trot. Our current status is distance at 12-15 miles/ 7 half mile hill sets/and 6.5 sustained trotting miles. So about 1/3 of the way there, and 90 days to make the rest happen. So about 18 training sessions for each of the individual areas (54 total opportunities to build the horse). WOW. I think I just had a moment!
December 24, 2011
Dear Santa: I am writing to inform you that I'm not sure of my naughty or nice status this year, but I hope it has been nice! It is my wish that I uplift people in their daily walk, and encourage them in their distance dreams of riding short, long, and far (whatever that happens to mean to each of them), be it five miles or five hundred. I do not wish this year for saddle, bridle, hoof boots, or tack. Please just give me a horse with a quiet mind, good controls, and heart that connects with mine.
Sincerely,
~E.G.
December 17, 2011
Nothing has changed and everything has changed. The changes have nothing to do with Journey, but rather an internal shift. I'm glad I've kept pretty good records. It helped a lot to have an endurance horse trainer look at those logs and help me find the holes in my process. There weren't many which was a boost to my confidence level, and the flaws that were picked out I know how to approach better, maybe a tiny bit more regimented than I'm used to but I understand the theory behind it, how to apply it. Weather right now will be a factor, so we may encounter stasis rather than loading, that is okay...we'll work it as soon as we can work it. We talked about Phebes too, and the value of riding a horse that you aren't afraid of on some level. That it is okay to shift gears for the betterment of goals, life, and limb. I was also reminded that performance mares do tie-up. It is a difficult management issue for these horses, and even international level horses with professionals doing it can have it happen. It took a heaviness from my heart as I thought that I had broken her. Phebes could perhaps be retrained and attempted again at some juncture, or in another's more capable hands. The horse for me at this time is my little speckled wonder. It is okay to let go of the past, move on, and be happy with what I have (Journey) instead of grieving after what I do not (Phebes). For the first time I feel at peace with that and ready to start again.
~E.G.
December 11, 2011
I proved my point to myself yesterday. Pushed past my non-motivation, went out into the cold but sunny day and caught up Journey. My only agenda was to desensitize with the cotton rope around her legs. It became a meditation of sorts. Catching each leg with the rope and gently pulling forward until she gave, then gently releasing that pressure. Telling her she was a "good girl." In some ways the day became a self-fulfilled prophecy, in that just the action of "doing" became the goal itself. I did not seek an outcome, only a process, and in so doing was very satisfied with the result. Life is good.
~E.G.
December 10, 2011
Wow...or should I say non-wow? There sure hasn't been much happening since Thanksgiving day. Journey has had maybe three significant rides since then. One on the road that was very frustrating, one at the park that was her best ever ride, and once since that was half-bad, half-good again near home. Do you notice that I say once, and one, and one? That is probably more the crux of things. I've been working more hours, have less daylight, and I'm tired. Fibromyalgia will do that to you. A kind of mindless fatigue that cannot be believed unless you've experienced it. A "feel like I could lay down and die" kind of tired even when I get up in the morning. If I use my arms or my legs repetitively for something like sweeping, dusting, wiping, working with the horse, the next day (if not sooner) I will have tendinitis. If I continue to push through it at times I have muscular rigidity (like tie up actually), with the muscles in my arms contracted, painful, and hard. The same will happen in my shoulders, and neck. The joints in my fingers and feet swell, red and painful if I over use them. At the all time low in this illness my arms were so seized up that I could not lift my coffee cup, I did not have the strength to hold it up. My non-working hours were spent rolled up in bed under warm blankets not wanting to move at all. I had to change my job to one that was less physical (and much less money). I have to do all things physical in thoughtful moderation, but on the other hand I can't "quit" moving completely or I stiffen up so bad I can't move at all.
*sigh*
I've taken a lot of stuff from people out in the blog-ish-phere because I don't do this, and I don't do that. But what I do...is the best I can. Ride 30 miles with Fibromyalgia. Train a horse with Fibromyalgia. Try moving hay with Fibromyalgia! Walk through just one of "my" days with the burden of pain, and the load of pharmaceuticals on board, and tell me then that you could do better. In fact, I bet you wouldn't ride a horse at all. I can remember my before illness days. I was a ball of energy and probably could have done the miles without the horse!
Winter is my toughest time of year. The cold makes everything worse.
But then...horse, makes everything better. They are my reason for getting up, moving, and doing, even when at times, like today I do not want to. At least they gave me a reason to go outside, clean their stalls, and feed them cookies. The old adage that the outside of a horse is good for the inside of a person is incredibly and delightfully true. Even in the kingdom of mare.
~E.G.
Thanksgiving Day 2011
Oh...so glad to have this day off, and the next, and the next, and the next! I guess you'd say I'm thankful. A pumpkin cheesecake is baking in the oven, and I'm cooking a somewhat non-traditional dinner for myself and LSEGH. The actually family dinner will be elsewhere on Sunday. Browning lean pork chops to be oven baked over stuffing, mashed potatoes and gravy, slaw, cranberry relish on the side, and some kind of undecided veggie. Then I will live vicariously through the character of Stephanie Plum (book eleven in the series). The horses are being moved away from the road today into our back yard with flakes of hay to keep them hopefully safe from the pellet gun for the weekend.
Maybe I Care Too Much
Do you ever wonder about the viciousness on message boards and blogs? Sometimes I wonder what that is really about. It reminds me of the bullying that takes place in junior high as the kids group together to demean some poor undeserving, unsuspecting soul. It makes them feel powerful or better somehow I guess. In my life I try to treat you where ever "you" are as I would if we were face to face. If we disagree, I'll choose a quiet time to talk it out, and work at a friendly resolution. Or agree to a difference in opinion that allows us to remain friends. After all, we are all people, are we not? I want us to still respect each other at the end of the day. Often in attacking a topic, people begin to attack one another. I'll remind you that my life, my way of doing things may differ from yours. Which doesn't make me wrong or you right. It just makes us different. When it comes to distance riding I don't need, want, or expect someone else to do it for me. Sometimes I will ask the advice of others to see if I am missing something, or can tweak something. Just because that advice is given it does not mean I have to take it. I get a lot of different ideas and opinions pushed my way. If it resonates with me I will think about it. If I can afford it and it resonates with me I will try it. If it doesn't meet either criteria I'm not going to bother starting something I cannot accomplish "your way." I won't always agree with you, but I will give you the respect to not demean you on public forums. Please be an adult and give me the same consideration. Please. People are complex, they have feelings, complicated lives, and you do not know anyone's heart. Be kind out there in the cyber world.
~ E.G.
"Endurance is not about the destination, it is about the journey." ~ E.G.
If you would like to start distance riding and have questions along the way you can email me at jackereynolds@yahoo.com
If I don't have an answer I'll try to point you towards a resource or a person who might. Just remember that I too am a novice with only a half dozen competitions, though thousands of miles under my saddle.
If you live in southeastern Indiana and would like to condition slow (glacier melting slow) for Limited Distance or train for ACTHA rides together contact me at jackereynolds@yahoo.com
Gear, events, and stuff:
Events: The Big Bad Blogger's Distance Race, where bloggers compete for the year end high mileage on horseback.
email: jackereynolds@yahoo.com
